Cleaning stalls is no horse owner’s favorite job, yet a recent radio story might give certain folks second thoughts.
While it’ll come across humorous of sorts to many, before reading further one fairly ought to be informed. Connotations can be taken in various ways so some might even become offended.
One might bluntly accurately insist this is a “dung” tale. Another printed piece declared, “It wasn’t easy getting this crap.”
Having done the backup research indicating factually, the firm Dixieland Preserves is selling pint jars of horse “turds.”
Now, this isn’t just any old horse “manure” so common in every barn around. It’s from 1997 Kentucky Derby and Preakness stakes winner Silver Charm.
Evidently Kentucky artist Coleman Larkin has come up with an entrepreneur idea appealing to newcomers not initially interested in horses.
Actually the idea started with his cat. The artist decided he wanted a condensed piece of his pet’s “feces” as a conversation piece on his desk.
Some of Larkin’s projects are done with epoxy resin, which is a preserving liquid. He thought that ought to would work well for conserving his unique projectBottom of Form
“The idea went wrong, because the epoxy resin is so difficult to work with,” Larkin said.
But Larkin, who is in the middle of horse racing country, didn’t give up on the brainchild. He went much bigger with the idea.
After months of experimenting with horses from a local stable, Larkin found the right formula to properly maintain horse “poop.”
Having worked with the Kentucky for Kentucky website, Larkin knew they’d be into the weird idea.
“If I figured out a way to preserve horse ‘turds,’ I was sure that’d fit into their style perfectly,” Larkin said. “It took months to figure out how to do it, but I finally cracked the code.”
He then reached out to Coolmore Farms, home of the last two Triple Crown winners, Justify and American Pharoah.
“I thought I could procure either of those champions’ horse ‘crap,’ but they were not into that idea at all,” Larkin said.
However, he was friends with Michael Blowen, owner of Old Friends Farm, Georgetown, Kentucky, home of Silver Charm. Blowen liked the idea and became a willing partner in the new “poop” business.
Larkin made 100 jars of the horse “manure” that is being sold on the Kentucky for Kentucky website.
It’s promoted: “Equal parts art and novelty, these gorgeous ‘nuggets’ are digested Kentucky bluegrass and whatever else horses eat. They were daringly harvested by the artist himself, fresh from the haunches of legendary 1997 Kentucky Derby winner Silver Charm.”
“Derby Turds” are promoted as the first in a Dixieland Preserves line of bizarre Southern resin “encapsulations.”
Silver Charm, great-great-grandson of the famed War Admiral, “crapped” all over the competition in the 1997 Preakness Stakes.
He also placed at Belmont, narrowly missing the third jewel of the elusive Triple Crown. Silver Charm is considered one of the Top 100 racehorses of the 20th century. In 2007, he was inducted into the United States Racing Hall of Fame.
Silver Charm’s incomparable “bowel movement” is suspended in crystal clear epoxy resin inside a 16-ounce Mason jar.
“It’s a very long, very ridiculous procedure,” Larkin said. “I personally guarantee they’ll last longer than you do.”
So what’s it really good for?
Promoters have proclaimed: “Silver Charm’s majestic, immortalized ‘manure’ should be displayed in a place of honor. And it should be passed from generation to generation like the priceless and irreplaceable family heirloom that it is.
“Put it on the mantle and be whisked away to a sophisticated world of the Kentucky Derby every time you see it. Set one on your windowsill and let the sunlight sparkle upon this exquisite specimen of equine ‘excrement.’ Or plop one in the office as the perfect metaphor of never ending ‘horseshit’ in the business world.
“No matter where it ends up, everyone will wonder at the awesome implausibility of this miraculous relic,” the sellers decreed.
So the two most frequent questions about the unique equine potion. Does it smell like manure? What does a jar of it cost?
No barnyard odor to the “poop in a jar,” and no added fragrance either. Yet, one might not be certain of that since the “product” is typically tightly sealed inside.
A limited run of “Derby Turds” is now available for $200 a jar through the online website.
Net proceeds are to be donated to the Old Friends Farm, which is actually a nonprofit Thoroughbred retirement facility.
Admittedly, it’s an ingenious idea that all barn cleaners of generations now and gone by wish they’d thought of first.